A little closer!

When your child is on the opposite side of the world they are not close. But there are things that bring you just a little closer-like skype! Last night we got to skype Ellinor and the wonderful people that are caring for her and we felt close. The Dunns were so generous with their time and are generous in love to our daughter and we are so grateful. Beyond words grateful, it's a heart thing.
Yesterday Holly took our case to court! The next step is to hear when our actual court date will be and we are so excited! We've known our daughter for 7 months and now things are happening!
We also got a call from the Orphan's Hope Grant people last night to ask if we'd like to be entered in a draw for funding. Yes we would!
We also got to learn so much about Ellinor; how big she is, how close she is to walking (I think before xmas!) and her first word! We got to hear a good belly laugh when she played peek a boo and see her in the super cute outfit we sent (you know the one with the boots? to a tropical country? haha!) We also learned how divinely we have been matched together.

Ellinor's first word is Lai lai which means 'come' in Mandarin. We're coming baby girl!

Successfully delivered!

We've been waiting 6 weeks for a social worker report, which has thrown me a little because our social worker here wrote up our report in 2 days! Everyone is busy and I will be patient because if someone has to respond to my email, they're spending less time caring for my baby and her playmates and getting her home. As an adoptive mom I'm working to let go of my urgency, because it belongs to me and Jesus. So I keep reminding myself!

We've also been waiting almost 3 months for Ellinor's 1st care package to get to her and guess what!?! It's there! Boats are slow. I have to admit I was mostly excited because I wanted to see how big she is and I can judge better when she wearing 6-12 month clothes that I have held before! The picture below though, was the best part. She looks so happy! It makes my heart happy too! Her big brother insisted on sending the piano... And the shoes tied together with a note are similar to the ones her big brother learned to walk in, I don't think Ellinor is far from taking some first steps her self!

Days go by...

We are so blessed to have our daughter in such good hands that I think it really makes the wait easier for us. I did not say easy however. The pictures we receive of her are beautiful, I need a better camera to keep up the quality! Timeline wise we are pretty close to requesting a court date. Because of a few new laws, we needed a signature and a report back from a social worker to request such date. After that we'll be able to move forward until we hit another bump in the road. While I would rather fly over these bumps and get some sweet airtime, it's probably better that the Lord grants me patience and we smooth them out instead. We are very excited for Nora to come home. Honestly, her room is near ready and Jude's pre-loved cloth diapers are washed and folded in a bin. A great friend with great taste has filled Ellinor's closet with not-your-average-hand-me-downs. We feel pretty ready. Every once in a while my mind reminds me that I haven't ever done this before. Adoption. But then I remind my mind that there's lots of things I haven't done before and everything is working out alright. We also are very lucky to have so much adoption around our family that it seems very natural. Children, all of them, are a blessing. I am so grateful that my job and my life cause me to encounter so many children of all kinds. I try not to take for granted what I have been entrusted with. (Not like i'm a chosen one or anything, too much Harry Potter?) But there are days I don't think twice about reflecting on what I've learned from the less vertical of the population. not to mention, kids really do say the funniest things. Anyway, there's my thoughts for the month and a little update. Pray with us that we can apply to court soon and that a court date will follow shortly after!

Almost Wordless Wednesday

I could write a post every week. But the topic would be the same: Waiting. Right now we're waiting for a signature, after that we'll be able to apply for a court date in Taiwan! Until then...

Hello sweet girl!

Our Daughter

We have a daughter! She is practically perfect in every way and we are in love! This girl has amazing hair, I can't wait for the pig tails! More than that we can't wait to hold her. All in time, but while we wait, Ellinor is in the best care, and we get pictures almost every month. A gift. So here she is at 6 months old.

Believe it or not her hair has relaxed since her early days :)

E at 3 months ish...

Big Bro around the same age!

We are grateful. Please pray for smooth sailing as we move forward.

Like right now

"Mom? Do you think my baby sister knows there's mashed potatoes in french fries?"
"Nope, I guess you'll just have to tell her when she gets here."
"She should be here. Like right now."

Forward

Yesterday, I wrote after a very encouraging email. Approved. Later, in the evening (morning in Taiwan) I got an email with the subject line 'get started!' I had asked if we should go ahead and do our home study update when it runs out (which is soon anyway) or if we should just wait so that it would last longer ie: do it right before we get a referral. The email message that followed was even more exciting than the subject:

"Please get started as soon as possible!  You are very close!!!"

Well that's a lot faster than we expected! Our application approval took 3 months instead of the regular 1. This next part, waiting to hear when to start our referral because we're getting close, usually takes 8-16 months... and it took us maybe 8 hours? I'm not complaining!

It is a strange phenomena to ignore the part of the brain that longs for your child. This part of your family you've never met. Ignoring your longing is a coping mechanism because nothing about international adoption is predictable. I didn't even realize that I had pushed all of those thoughts and emotions towards the back of my brain, until it was go time. My friend always tells me it's not for the faint of heart, and she is right. It might seem cold or the opposite of nurturing but like I said it's a coping mechanism.

Then, every once in a while, it's go time! Get  as much paper work and appointments completed in the smallest amount of time so that the part that you can control isn't the part that slows anything down. That's where we're at right now - update background checks, intervention checks, medicals and the home study as fast as we can so we can send it to the Alberta government to re-approve us. For a different country this time (more on that another day). Then we'll send it to Taiwan and wait for a referral. We'll do lots of immigration work so that when they say she's ours there will be no more waiting. Except maybe the day of travelling to her :)

My same friend refers to this up & down as 'Hurry Up and Wait' (She coined this phrase based on her families experience with international adoption.) It couldn't be a more perfect way to describe this process.

His Hands Taiwan Xi En

This morning I woke up to a really great e-mail! It was the one where His Hands Taiwan/ Taiwan Xi En (http://taiwanxien.org/) said that our application has been approved and we are accepted to their program for adoption! Needless to say I cried then called Matt, texted my family, and our friends, woohoo!

There are so many positive things about adopting our child from this ministry.Their mission is first to the mothers who are pregnant and need an option to carry their child to term. They've made a home for them, created work for them, they ensure good maternal care and they act out Jesus' love all day and all night. Because of this, we have a greater chance of meeting our child's birthmom - an opportunity of a lifetime really. Our daughter will be in a nursery while we process paperwork that has nannies who will love her, so that when we come for her she will be able to love us. We also will get to skype her, she will know our voices and faces (depending on the internet connection :)) before we can get to her. We'll be able to send her care packages and support the people who created this ministry long after she is home and will have comfort knowing that when we are able to return to Taiwan as a family down the road there will be connections and familiar faces.

Regardless of how she comes to us, she is the child God has for us. Just like how he perfectly created our son. We are beyond excited!

We still have a long road before she will be home with us; paperwork, more paper work, approvals and decrees, appointments and travel plans, and just some straight up waiting, but I am so relieved that it feels like forward!

P.S. HH even asked for our home study because we are close to the top of the list and its almost time to start translation!!!

Waiting: The Eb and Flow

This last month, waiting has been difficult. I've learned about myself that when there is nothing to do to progress the adoption I am fine. I am able to go on with my life like a normal person. When I am waiting for an e-mail I feel like I am also waiting to choose her name and waiting to start decorating her room, waiting to book flights, start a life book, and waiting to hold her.

Because of recent e-mails, we are greatly reconsidering Taiwan Xi En, and at this point are holding very loosely our own plans, and are clinging to His instead. We also are waiting for a reply that could decide where are daughter will be rooted. We already had this part figured out and that is why we once again are reminded this is not our plan, but our journey.

When I'm waiting, we're all waiting because I process the majority of my thoughts out loud. I've caught up on every blog, every facebook page, any resource having to with a related adoption story and still haven't heard back. I am learning patience. Over the last week though my anxiousness had subsided and God has given me that peace. Today there were posts and statuses and I no longer feel like everything stopped. The best thing though was when my little man came in my room and declared, "My baby sister needs a new toy. Maybe a bigger one, for when she gets bigger." Insert my thoughts-"A bigger toy like one you'd like to play with...?" But he continued with questions, "Will we get to keep her when she's big?" "Yes, we get to keep her forever." "Like for Christmas and Easter?" "Yes,we get to keep her forever." "Like until she's this big?" "Yes, we'll get to keep her forever, just like we get to keep you forever." (Later he was distracted by the Caillou theme song, an episode which was about Chinese New Year!)

Speaking of forever, My hubby's brother got married this weekend, and I was with my soon-to-be-sister-in-law the day before. She was different than other bride's I've spent time with because even though she was so excited to be with the one she loved the most, she also was calm because she knew she would have her entire life to be with him. God-willing, as she would say.

As I write this I realize the same; I can't wait to be with our daughter and there is peace in the reassurance that, "Yes, we will get to keep her forever!"

A little more trust (and a little more us)

The last email I received from Taiwan said that we were near the top of the list to receive not a referral but an application. From said application it would take 1-3 years for a referral. Well we weren't actually close to the top of the list, we are at the top of the list, and so i'll be filling out another application today. There are a few complications and details to be sure of, but in the mean time, why not fill out another form that might lead us to our daughter. It feels kind of weird, to just switch countries. While quite fairly on the other hand, there is just peace in trusting that God knows our daughter; born or not yet, Vietnam or Taiwan, orphanage or foster home, what special needs she may have, how old she'll be when we receive her picture. All of these unknowns should make someone like me (a control freak who itemizes her Christmas list so there are little to no unknowns...) not even enter a journey like this. But i'm excited. So excited. Because I know she'll be perfect, and I know she'll be ours. A gift from God.
I've picked up a few things for her, as we come across important milestones on our journey to her (or as we come across really great deals). My justification of course, is to not have to buy everything when we get a referral or even after we meet her to know her true size (Toms shoes?).
                                                           
                                                                    


This application feels like a milestone kind of. When we first got on the list to wait for an application, we were so excited and then Taiwan's adoption process went through some major changes, which slowed some things down alot. So we hold it all loosely.We're just all pretty excited to have our little here in our home. Even the big bro includes her in our (his) future plans... "When my baby sister comes home, we should go to Disney Land!" He used to try wrapping his head around when that would be. When we did our home study visits, he thought our social worker was going to bring her on our last visit. So we tried explaining that she probably wouldn't be home until he was in Kindergarten. Then he wanted to grow up faster (and even kind of felt bad that he couldn't) so she could come home. Now that all things adoption are paper work and waiting, we try not to talk to him about it. My good friend, who has adopted twice, told me it may take as long as he's been alive, for her to come home. Good perspective.

Last thing. I'm obviously very new to blogging. And in my experience, no one's experience is the same and so it's hard to find a that resonates closely enough to my own. That's why I share. It seems not many Canadians adopt from Taiwan, and no one who is currently adopting from Vietnam is writing about it.  What does it mean to adopt from the special needs list? Matt and I are very blessed to have a community of adopted and adoptive friends who have a plethora of experience who we can talk to. I am grateful for that and am happy to share our experience with anyone who wants it.

No Straight Path

Isn't it funny that the day I record our adoption journey that we'd get an e-mail from the orphanage in Taiwan saying that we're almost at the top of the list for the application. I still am pretty sure that Vietnam is the way to go for us, but you never know with adoption. I always say its like waiting in line at the grocery store, and you never know which line will actually go faster. So unpredictable! So far there is peace in the wait and trust in the timing of everything. I'm sure when we are able to put a face to our little person the wait will be much more challenging :)

The beginning.... Sort of...

I probably should have started this blog a long time ago, perhaps years when we first started thinking about adoption, but here I am. Better late than never. My husband, my son and i are on a journey to bring our daughter home from Vietnam. We really have no idea of the timeline ahead, but we do know a timeline of what's happened so far. We're eagerly anticipating the day we meet our daughter (and baby sister) and in the mean time we live. Thanks for reading!